Shawana Fringuello

The One That I Want: A Novel REALLY?? Did We All Read The Same Book? – Mercedes L. Johnmeyer – Kingsland, GA
Based on all the glowing reviews of this book (which I’m now wondering if a number of them aren’t shills by friends of the author), I was expecting to love this book. I absolutely did NOT. I didn’t hate it, but I was tempted to quit about half-way through. I stuck with it though…I kept telling myself ‘All those people raved about it, maybe it gets better’. Nope.

Right off the bat, I didn’t like Tilly. She’s not offensive, or rude in any way, but her nickname ‘Silly Tilly’ is definitely the best way to describe her. I could not relate AT ALL to someone so desperate to relieve her high-school days, that she would become the school guidance counselor just to be able to be there everyday. Her pathetic excitement at planning the prom year after year…she’s 32!! Get over it! No WONDER her husband had one foot out the door!

I did like the flashes of her seeing the future. I thought it was the only thing that made the book somewhat interesting and worth finishing. The whole dynamic between Tilly and her husband Tyler began to wear on me though…as did her relationship with her sister Darcy. I could absolutely understand Tyler wanting to leave little Westlake, to see what else life had to offer him. It infuriated me that Tilly, while not wanting to leave the only place she’s ever lived (which I can understand), was so close minded that she couldn’t grasp how someone else would want to. She wanted everything to stay just it is was…always. And even though her outlook on life changes through the novel, I never really got over my initial dislike for her.

The ’surprise’ at the end, the big secret her father’s been keeping for years, felt totally out of place. It’s almost like it was thrown in as an after thought just to give the story a bit of shock value. Well, it wasn’t shocking, it was sad and unnecessary. Overall, I do NOT recommend this book. It’s certainly not the worst book I’ve ever read, but I definitely wouldn’t categorize this as a ‘Must Read’. I have Ms. Scotch’s two other novels on my wishlist, but I think I’m gonna hold off for awhile before attempting another of her books. I’m not ready to write her off completely, but I won’t be expecting so much next time around.
Quick Read… great author – Beth Bawm – Michigan
Allison Winn Scotch has sucked me in to a couple books now, and I will definitely check out all her future titles. She is consistent in delivering solid entertainment and drawing you into a world and out of your own.
This story is realistic enough it speaks to your own life and magical enough to let you dream of having clarity yourself.
a must read – N. Rogers –
Essentially this book comes down to something all too familiar for anyone from a small-ish or small hometown: how stuck you can become. In this case Tilly doesn’t mind being stuck; she likes her hometown. In fact, while many people want to leave all memories of high school far behind them, Tilly loved it so much that she went to work there as a guidance counselor. She’s decided that her life will be perfect once she and her high school sweetheart turned husband have a baby. What Tilly doesn’t realize is that her life is about to change dramatically. After an encounter with a former friend, Tilly starts having visions about bad things to come (her recovering alcoholic father getting drunk, her husband leaving her)…and then they start coming true! Slowly, Tilly comes to learn that moving beyond high school can actually be a good thing.

My only real complaint with this book was the location description not being totally accurate (a small town in the northwest is not anywhere near 81,000–I hope that was a typo); but overall the story is incredibly relatable for anyone who didn’t grow up in “the big city.” I know people who are just like Tilly and her friends and family. The One That I Want is a must read.
: Tilly Farmer is thirty-two years old and has the perfect life she always dreamed of: married to her high school sweetheart, working as a guidance counselor in her hometown, trying for a baby. Perfect. 

In fact, on the surface you might never know how tough things used to be. At seventeen, Tilly lost her mother to cancer, her father drowned his grief in alcohol, and she played parent to her two younger sisters more often than being a kid herself. Still Tilly never let tragedy overtake her belief that hard work and good cheer could solve any problem. Of course she’s also spent a lifetime plastering a smile on her face and putting everyone else’s problems ahead of her own.
But that relentless happiness has served her well—her sisters are grown and content, her dad is ten years sober, and she’s helping her students achieve all their dreams while she and her husband, Tyler, start a family. A perfect life indeed.

Then one sweltering afternoon at the local fair, everything changes. Tilly wanders into the fortune teller’s tent and is greeted by an old childhood friend, now a psychic, who offers her more than just a reading. “I’m giving you the gift of clarity,” her friend says. “It’s what I always thought you needed.” And soon enough, Tilly starts seeing things: her father relapsing, staggering out of a bar with his car keys in hand; Tyler uprooting their happy, stable life, a packed U-Haul in their driveway; and even more disturbing, these visions start coming true. Suddenly Tilly’s perfect life, so meticulously mapped out, seems to be crumbling around her. And she’s not sure what’s more frightening: that she’s begun to see the future or what the future holds . . . 

As Tilly furiously races to keep up with—and hopefully change—her destiny, she faces the question: Which is the life she wants? The one she’s carefully nursed for decades, or the one she never considered possible?
The One That I Want: A Novel

• Time of My Life: A Novel
• The Department of Lost & Found
• After You: A Novel
• The Opposite of Me: A Novel
• Not Ready for Mom Jeans

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Part 3

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Hattie and John Bennett were missionaries in the United States during the 1880’s and 1890’s but they wished to become foreign missionaries so they started the long process to be approved, followed by plans for the long and extremely hard trip to Africa. In those years travel was crude with very little thought of passenger comfort unless one was very rich and had means to splurge. Hattie and John had no such budget.

The author wrote this great account of Hattie and John’s experience from letters that Hattie’s grandmother had written. The conditions family-wise were not good. They had two children and Hattie was pregnant with a third child. To tackle the trip to such an uncivilized part of the world would be taken with faith of God and the knowledge that Mozambique and that area in Africa would take much personal sacrifice to get there, to settle, to find their way to win natives to have faith, and survive the malaria so prevalent in the area as well as other diseases. Many died from malaria and related diseases.

The eventful trip by several ships and boats of all sizes ended at the shores end in southeast Africa. The land trek took them into the native country where primitive customs and living was an every day existence. The book follows them through good and bad with the emphases on “bad” as far as conditions.

They met other missionaries and worked with some most of their days there. Some would have to leave their camp to assist other camps when illness or conditions threatened those people and those same people had to help Hattie and John as well. They would encounter war between various tribes not knowing if those warriors would allow the missionaries to live or not.

Even today missionaries have a hard time in most areas they travel to as they spread Gods word and try to civilize them in many of their ways, some of which most of us could not imagine. You will learn much and feel the good done as well as the suffering as you live and travel with all of the missionaries and inhabitants of the area. Even though this story took place quite a few years ago, many of the obstacles still exist for present day missionaries as they attempt to spread Gods word in difficult areas of the world.

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There are so many different styles of comedy and everyone has their own, at least the ones that stand out do. You have the standard monologists that stand with a microphone and use words to craft their humor, musical type acts that either use instruments or sing and have musical accompaniment, prop acts that use visual aids to make the crowds laugh and improvisational acts that do comedy off the cuff. They are all great in their respective ways and I will not begin to categorize each and every style here. I will simply go through many stage performing comics and state why they are my favorites and then try to put it in a Top 10 list. There may even be some on here that you never heard of….yet! But that doesn’t mean that they aren’t amazingly funny. It just means that they aren’t a household name. There are thousands of great comedians out there performing all the time on the world stage that haven’t been discovered yet and just because you are great, it does not preclude that you will be a star.

So here we go: Robin Williams is a terrific example of comedy that has no boundaries. High energy and uninhibited with a flair for the dramatic and with a good percentage of improvisation thrown in. Jerry Seinfeld is a monologist that uses very well crafted words and sentences in observations on topics that everyone can relate to. Nothing comes out of his mouth that isn’t carefully thought out beforehand. Richard Pryor was one of a kind when it came to stand up. You never knew what he was going to say but you knew sure as hell that it was going to be delivered in his irreverent style and that you were gonna laugh your ass off! George Carlin is the best of both worlds. He is a monologist, a wordsmith and his facial expressions are to die for. He is very animated in his approach and you can’t help but get caught up in the show. Brian Regan also fits the same style of monology with animated goofy facial expressions. His material is all very relatable and makes him one of the most enjoyable acts working the circuit today. Howie Mandel is one of the best ad-libers in the business today. His wit and likability is flawless and when he first appeared on the scene in the late 70’s would sometimes work in props to add to the experience. The Amazing Jonathan, like Howie, uses the audience to make a ‘no two shows the same’ kind of atmosphere. He uses props as aids and sort of does magic in a unique way. Steven Wright has a classic style. He uses well thought out and creative observational humor and puts it all in a very deadpan and deliberate delivery with his very own slant on things. I remember working with Steve at the old Improv in NYC. He was about to go on and looked very introspective and I asked him if he was okay. He looked up and in his low key voice said, “I’m very hyper.” He kills me. Bill Cosby is the classic storyteller. No one can deliver them like he does. The best thing is that no matter how long the story is, you never get bored listening to him tell it. Great style and many have been influenced by him over the years. Victor Borge was definitely a master musical comedian. He started as a classical pianist, who later evolved into a consumate comedian. Known as ‘The Great Dane’, he surely was and is terribly missed. Otto and George is a Triple X rated ventriloquist that is very dirty and hysterically funny. He is one of a kind and one act that I absolutely love to watch when I am off and can get to a show. He makes me hurt from laughter. You never know what Otto is going to make George say. Sam Kinison was a comedian with a very irreverent style as Pryor was.

You never knew what topic he was going to rant about but you knew he was going to attack it with full force. A great, loud and funny stage persona. Jay Leno is a fantastic monologist. Don’t go by what you see on The Tonight Show either because that is written material that has to be put together quickly by a staff of writers all of the time. Go see his live show and you will see the real Jay Leno. Like Seinfeld, he uses carefully crafted words to construct a very visual image for the audience to imagine. Abbott & Costello were one of the best comedy teams of all time. As I mentioned in other articles, they had the unique ability to mix cerebral material and slapstick together as one and present it in one of the most enjoyable presentations you could ever see. Don Rickels is a great crowd working comedian that uses the audience for his humor.

He breaks down all stereotypes and barriers and makes people realize that in the end we are the same. And even though his stage persona may come across as insulting in a comedy way, you know that in his soul he is a sweet, genuine and a very nice man. He is all those things. Martin & Lewis were a great comedy team that mixed slapstick with music. Dean had a great, warm and loving personality on stage and Jerry was the hyper wild kid that might do just about anything for the laugh. They were the show to see in the 50’s and well worth any price of admission. For my honorable mentions I would love to list Steve Martin, Jack Benny, Henny Youngman, Jim Carrey, Monty Python, Burns & Allen, Red Skelton, Bob Nelson, Eddie Murphy, Dom Irerra, Richard Jeni, Bob Hope, Pudgie, Buddy Hackett, Pat Cooper, Danny Kaye, Woody Allen, Mel Brooks & Carl Reiner, Jackie Mason, Jeff Dunham, The Great Ballantine, Lisa Lampanelli, Rosie O’Donnell, Senor Wences, Foster Brooks, George Wallace, Lewis Black, Bobby Collins, Burns & Schreiber, Phyllis Diller, Patti Rosborough, Greg Hahn, Alan Stephen, Dennis Blair, Carrot Top, Pee Wee Herman (Paul Reubens), Jackie Vernon, Charlie Callas, Larry David, Nick Di Paolo, Denis Leary and Allen & Rossi. So here we go: My Top 10 List Of Favorite Stage Comedians

1. Abbott & Costello

2. Martin & Lewis

3. Robin Williams

4. Otto & George

5. Richard Pryor

6. George Carlin

7. Bill Cosby

8. Howie Mandel

9. The Amazing Jonathan

10. Jerry Seinfeld, Jay Leno & Brian Regan (Tied for 10th) That’s it for my Favorites List. Believe me, that was difficult for me to do. Being a comedian myself for so long it is obvious that I have been heavily influenced by the genre and there is just so many acts that I have loved to watch in my life. For me to mention them all would take entirely too long. If you have any favorites that I haven’t mentioned, let me know because I might have forgotten a few myself. Once again, thanks for reading, from THE COMEDY TORNADO!!

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Are you a manager, salesperson, business owner or public speaker who gives business presentations as a regular part of your career? Maybe this is a skill you are looking to develop. Either way you will want to read on and discover some of the best ways to add impact to your presentations.

Simple changes can lead to big results. With some focused presentation training you will see a more engaged audience, focused energy and momentum, and better results on the back end.

Keep Your Audience Engaged

How long is your presentation? I highly recommend that you watch a few presentations from TED which are limited to 20 minutes each regardless of the content. Everyone from Al Gore to Bill Gates has presented and impressed audiences in just 20 minutes.

Take a cue from presentation expert Garr Reynolds and learn from the Japanese art of presenting. Less is More. Sometimes we feel pressure to have crowded slides packed with information and long presentations jammed with detail after detail. More information does not equal a more effective business presentations.

Keep your presentations to 20-30 minutes. You will hold your audiences attention better and it will require you to remove non-critical words or sections.

Like a great movie or song, when you are forced to say only the most important things, you end up with a high impact, highly effective presentation that lasts 30 minutes. Meanwhile your full hour long monologue would have killed the room and drained the energy. Momentum is everything so keep it moving forward! I promise that it will show up in your results.

Improving PowerPoint and Keynote Slide Design

In your presentation training be sure to include learning more about PowerPoint and Keynote slide design. You do not have to be a design expert, but educating yourself is important to your success. Your slides will impact your presentation and can enhance or detract from your results.

It doesn’t matter if you are leading a business meeting, sales presentation, sales training, marketing video or if you are a professional public speaker, your slides can move and inspire people into action, or bore and confuse your audience.

Each slide should focus on just one point. Limit yourself to 6 words or one large picture (or graph) with few or no words at all. The picture ideally should be expanded to fill the page. So that ultimately your slide will look like a billboard, rather than a newspaper article.

Memorize Your Presentation

Lastly, be sure that your notes or cue cards are not taking over you, or your presentation. Know your material well so that you can relax and focus on conveying your message and connecting with your audience. Never read your slides, or stand fumbling with notes. That is a sure fire way to appear nervous and novice. We will be sharing more information on the best way to quickly memorize material in upcoming articles and programs.

Presentation Training does not need to be complicated or overwhelming. Small changes will make a huge impact on how you connect with your audience, how you inspire them into action, and how confident you feel.

The next time your stand before a group of your peers, or an audience of strangers, apply these presentation training tips and rule the room!

APPLY THESE TIPS TODAY

Time your presentation.

Keep under 30 minutes.

Remove non-essential content.

Review and reduce slide content.

Know your material.

Look like a pro!

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When someone we love has committed suicide we are left with thousands of questions and no one to answer them. “Was there really no hope?” “Was I somehow to blame?” “How could you do this to me?” These are a few of the basic questions that echo in the aftermath.

As a funeral director I have held the hand of surviving family members after someone dear has ended their life. These survivors struggle with shock, guilt and anger as these questions haunt them endlessly. No one has a definitive answer but it is possible to gain some measure of understanding.

There is an expression that “Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.” To anyone contemplating leaving life behind this statement seems glib and trite. Life’s challenges can seem endless and sometimes no resolution appears viable. Even a short time immersed in deep depression can seem infinite. Whether the origins are physiological or psychological depression is an experience that seems more like falling into an abyss than navigating a dark tunnel with an exit light ahead. When there are repeated episodes of depression the respite periods can be quickly forgotten.

The belief that their problems are unending has little basis in reality. A study of 17 people who made serious efforts to end their lives by jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge suggests that their problems were more transitory than they thought. Only two of these individuals went on to kill themselves at a later date.

After a suicide people tend to examine their relationships under a microscope. Little remarks made in the heat of anger can loom larger than a football field. In truth we all tend to argue more with those we are closest to. All of us feel safer expressing our anger and venting our frustrations with someone we love. It is natural to assume that people who love us will understand and forgive. After a suicide these remarks take on a life of their own and mean far more to us than the person they were spoken to.

I have heard numerous stories from people who received calls from loved ones just before they commit suicide. The common thought is; “This was a cry for help and I let them down.” These calls are more likely an internal way of saying goodbye or even a means of preventing interruption during the suicide process.

The question; “How could you do this to me?” speaks to a feeling of responsibility. People committing suicide feel very isolated and alone. They most likely feel that no one would truly care. They may even feel so badly about themselves that they look upon what they are doing as a favor to those they are closest to. They see themselves as a burden and their death as a gift to loved ones. These people see little value in themselves and assume those who know them best can see it as well.

The suicide of someone close is like standing in proximity to an explosion. The closer we are the deeper our wounds. Many of the emotional scars left behind will never heal. There are far too many bits and pieces left behind to ever assemble and make sense. Finding some measure of understanding what was in the person’s mind and heart can provide us with some consolation and a start on the road to healing.

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Val accuses Holly of spending more time with Vince than Henry when Vince helps her set up Val’s barbecue on the terrace. Holly and Vince fall asleep, and Holly wakes up in Vince’s arms. Although it seems (to Val and everyone else) that they had sex Holly assures them that they didn’t and she realizes that she has feelings for Vince.

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